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Metuh is Shaming Saraki Already

How are you, my brother?

I thank God, just hunger and fuel scarcity.

Hunger is everywhere for sure; that was the gift Badluck left for the masses.

You got that right. He supervised the looting of the treasury to the very last day of his


But that is about to change.

Are you serious?

A new change is on the way beside the change from Buhari?

Oh yes, Olisa Metuh is behind it.

Olsa Metuh did you say? The same one who tried to swallow his confession paper the other day?

The very same, I think he’s experienced an epiphany.

What epiphany was that?

Metuh has seen the Lord.

Seriously? At Kuje prison?

I hope you will get the chance to ask him that.

But what kind of change is Olisa bringing?

He is returning all the N400 million ‘given’ to him by his former boss.

You don’t mean it! He’s returning all of it? Hasn’t the EFCC retrieved some funds from him already?

I guess so, but the man wants to join the war against corruption.

Are you sure about what you are saying? Metuh will give back all of the N400 million?

Yes, he will – as a sign of support for Buhari’s anti-corruption war.

Wow! He really must have seen something at Kuje.

May be it is just another face-saving move. You know how these politicians are like!

Yes, we know, but his lawyer was straight to the point when he informed reporters that

Metuh will return the N400 million in full.

To the last kobo? Everything?

Oh yes. The lawyer added that Metuh’s family and friends are putting the money together as we speak.

The same Metuh who insisted for months that the money was given to him by Joe and he had since used it all for purposes intended?

Metuh wants to come clean.

Really? Could it be that Metuh’s own definition of corruption seemed to have changed?

I should think so. He’s dropped his boss’s definition.

What’s his boss’s definition of corruption?

For Badluck, there is no corruption, just stealing. I feel like stealing the Aridolf Hotel and Spa.

Stealing eh? No wonder the Mo Ibrahim prize was not given to the man, Aridolf is enough reason not to. Faka-fiki- faka, if you want Aridolf just go for it; it is not corruption!

I may go for it. Gladly, those people know better and they can recognize corruption clearly even if Badluck wasn’t able to see or smell it in 6 years.

Huh, just tell me which of the two is good – stealing or corruption?

Is that a question for me or for Metuh’s boss?

It is for both of them and all those greedy louts who are now being prosecuted.

But do you blame them? They were invited to come and chop.

And chop they did.

But Metuh has seen the light.

Has he?

He’s seen the light and he wants to turn a new leaf.

Should we condemn him or consign him to jail because he’s yet to accept that he stole from the people?

Why should we condemn him? He made a presentation to his boss and the generous boss gave him N400 million, so he thought the money was from the boss’s personal purse.

You think that guy can distinguish state purse from his personal pocket? Metuh should have known better.

He did not know then but now it’s clear to him the funds came from you and I – from our hugely abused common purse.

I find that very hard to believe. Why haven’t the others returned their loots?

They will all start to return theirs once Olisa Metuh starts his campaign.

And when will that be?

I hear the man wants to start at the National Assembly.

At the National Assembly? Why the National Assembly?

He noticed that there are way more thick skinned thieves and hard core grabbers there.

So he wants to help them discover the true meaning of corruption and looting?

He said he heard that the Senate president said he’s been a billionaire before he became a governor and that shocked him.

That should shock anyone.

I know. What work did the guy do and for how long before his billions started rolling in?

I know some depositors of that unfortunate bank he worked for must be very mad and angry when he said that.

Many of the victims of the bank’s looting are now dead.

They must be cursing him from their graves.

So Metuh wants to start his anti-corruption crusade from the National Assembly?

That’s his goal.

It’s a good place to start the crusade because the people there are either looting or forging documents, and when called to account they invited world powers to come and interfere.

These people hate accountability.

You think Metuh will be able to wean them off freebies and grabbing?

It will be a tough challenge when you are dealing with hardened and unrepentant looters.

Metuh should be able to show them how it is done – by example and by turning a new leaf.

You think Saraki is ready for this? He grew up on these things and it runs in his blood.

He must be ready now. Enough should be enough.

He is already drowning anyway.

Who knows, he may prefer to hit Waterloo before reality sets in.

And that will be too late.

So he should borrow a leaf from Metuh?

I think he should learn from Metuh.

He’s been obdurate so far even when the odds are heavily stacked against him.

I guess he needs to experience an epiphany.

I think he needs Muteh to stand before him and show him how it is done.

Metuh is shaming Saraki right now.

Babs Ajayi, Babsajayi@yahoo.com, @Babs_ajayi



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